Health

Okay, so today we had to fill out these things for health.
We had to write all the meals we had this week. and all the snacks.
all the times we ate one cracker to keep us going
all the times we stopped to drink from the water fountain.
i'm guessing if we swallowed a bug in our sleep, we would have to write that too.

BUT ANYWAY:

here is the chart i had:
BREAKFAST:
WHAT DID YOU EAT?
1. toast.
2. slice of butter.
3. juice.
DID YOU FINISH IT ALL?
1. i think i did, except for possibly some crumbs i forgot to lick off the plate.
2. yes.
3. no.
DID YOU NOT FINISH ALL OF SOMETHING, IF SO: WHY DIDN'T YOU?
I WASNT THAT THIRSTY, OKAY?!?!?!?!

LUNCH:
WHAT DID YOU EAT?
the surprisingly not deathly (but still disgusting) cafeteria "special." yum yum.
DID YOU FINISH IT ALL?
no.
DID YOU NOT FINISH ALL OF SOMETHING, IF SO: WHY DIDN'T YOU?
i think you know why. have YOU ever tried stomaching a whole meal of that glop?
you could be home sick for weeks. and quite possibly hospitalized.

DINNER:
WHAT DID YOU EAT?
1. some kung-pow chicken
2. some rice
3. fortune cookie
DID YOU FINISH IT ALL?
1. yes
2. yes
3. no
DID YOU NOT FINISH ALL OF SOMETHING, IF SO: WHY DIDN'T YOU?
i didn't eat all of my fortune cookie because i don't think your fortune will come true if you eat the little paper.

Do your teachers force this one you?
How do you know if you eat bugs in your sleep?
Do you eat the little paper in your fortune cookies? i sure hope not. you fortune shall never come true.

Chewing gum leads to lies.

Today my teacher was on a rampage. a gummy sticky under-the-table rampage.
She took up the ENTIRE white-board today to write about how chewing gum in class was COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE!
My friend got caught chewing gum. she got detention.
i was chewing gum, as well. but i hid it.
my friend was REALLY MAD. she called the teacher over and said "TEACHER!! SHE IS CHEWING GUM TOO!!!"
so i quickly swallowed my gum just as my teacher was coming over.
"You have gum?" said the teacher, with eyes of evil.
"No," i began, "I was only running my tongue over my braces and messing with my braces. i can see how you would think i was chewing gum, but i wasn't. its just because i JUST got braces and they really hurt, so i was messing around with my mouth. not chewing gum. because, you cant chew gum with braces."
My teacher gave me a look of sympathy.
I've had my braces for two months. they don't hurt anymore. but its not like my teacher knew that.
my friend got double detention for lying.

Have you ever gotten away with something like that?
doesn't it feel just AWESOME?

Teachers

My teacher says "ummm" a lot.
this is her telling us a simple thing to do.
"oh hi umm class today umm we'll be umm looking at umm history. today we ummm are looking at the umm American umm revolution. so take out your ummm text books."

It makes me wonder, does anyone elses teacher do this? because none of my other teachers do that. just my one teacher.

Does your teacher do anything like that?
does your teacher do anything weird like that?
Are your teachers hyper or strange?